At the most basic
level of self-defense
you do not care
about the attacker,
you do whatever
you have to do to
get away.
At the highest level
of self-defense, you
take the situation
completely under
control without
hurting the
attacker or getting
hurt yourself.
Topic
The Deeper Purpose of Sparring
Martial arts and self defense are intimately linked. While we
may strive to achieve deeper levels in our practice, and while
practice may get us into shape, reduce stress and increase
self-discipline, the fundamental purpose of martial arts
remains — in many people’s minds – self-defense.
In the dojo, we practice many things. We learn basic
techniques, then combinations to develop fluidity of
movement. We practice breathing, tension and relaxation.
We practice kata and traditional forms. All of these serve to
advance our practice and hone our ability.
And then there is sparring. This is the element of practice
that’s suppose to put it all together, a means to simulate a
real fight, and some people can’t get enough of it. To many
martial arts students, sparring is what it’s all about, it’s the
real deal, the opportunity to “try out” everything they’re
learning along the way.
But just how similar is sparring to self-defense? And, if
we’re not sparring for self-defense, why make it part of the
practice at all?
The Difference Between Sparring & Self Defense
To begin with, let’s not confuse sparring with real self-
defense situations. There are several differences. Sparring
is often simply a game of tag, seeing who can touch whom
first with a technique. For safety reasons, there is little
or no contact, altered distancing, slight focus and no 2-6
inch follow-through. Consequently, there’s often lots of
hypothetical questions — Did the strike actually land or not?
Would it have caused any damage? Did it hit a good target?
For these reasons, some people prefer full contact, or no-
holds-barred, fighting. This is certainly closer to simulating
a real self-defense situation, but it’s still faulty. Sparring in a
tournament, you have the luxury of knowing who you are
going to fight, and (generally) an opportunity to review their
previous fights before you face them. This allows you and
your trainers and handlers the opportunity to come up with
a strategy for victory. You also have a specific fight date and
time, so you can physically and mentally prepare yourself.
There are no weapons, a doctor is on the scene, there are
specific rest periods, and a referee is there to make sure
that the situation doesn’t get out of hand. Everyone wears
protective gear so that no one ends up hospitalized. In the
dojo, sparring is even more closely regulated. The point is
that these are all highly controlled, contained and monitored
environments. In a real self-defense situation, on the street,
almost exactly the opposite is true. You have no idea when
or where you may be attacked, or by whom. They may have
a weapon, and it may be one or multiple attackers. They may
be under the influence of mind-altering drugs. There is no
way to know their fighting ability or their intentions — just
how far will they carry this assault?
While there are huge differences, there are still many skills
acquired in sparring that translate well into self-defense
training. Nothing teaches timing like moving with a partner.
If you practice full contact, you begin to understand
distancing. Sparring teaches you how to move, how to
work the whole body, how to focus a strike and how to hit
a moving target. These are all very valuable techniques for
self-defense. There are many reasons to practice sparring for
self-defense; the point is, be sure that you understand the
difference between the two.
To successfully
defend yourself
you must be able
to keep your
composure during
an attack.
Maintain
intention
and attention.
Can Sparring Hinder the Martial Artist?
The problem with sparring, and the danger of devoting too
much of your practice to it, lies not in the skills developed,
but in the way it enhances the strength of your ego. All great
masters have taught that, at the core of martial arts, lies
harmony, selflessness, realization and oneness, not merely
the ability to win a fight. In the 20th century, sparring has
evolved into a competition, rather than an opportunity for
the participants to improve their skills and advance their
understanding. And, as in many things, it’s not the what or
how that need to be adjusted, just the why. For example, the
next time you’re sparring, notice how often your competitive
nature surfaces. Don’t embrace it, don’t rationalize that
through competition you are pushing yourself to be your
best, but don’t repress the tendency either. Just calmly
recognize the feelings and thoughts. Notice when the ego
surges to the front, especially when you get hit. Take a
breath and ask yourself, “Does it really matter?”
Again, be mindful of the difference between self-defense
and sparring. On the street, you may actually be called upon
to defend your safety. Winning and losing become very
important. In the dojo, you and your partner are pushing
each other to the best of your ability. Exactly what is there
to win? Practice intensely, and understand the value of good
self-defense.
Be mindful of planning fakes, strategies and setups. You
know — when you throw a technique in order to get a
specific response, allowing you to then land something else.
In truth, these aren’t strategies at all — they’re tricks. When
you employ tricks, your mind is busy. You’re not feeling
motion. You’re thinking about how, when and what they’re
going to do, and how and what you’re going to follow up
with, and your mind becomes so incredibly active that you
cannot possibly respond spontaneously and creatively in
the moment. In fact, you are at your most vulnerable when
you are thinking of attacking, when you’re planning and
plotting. To attack takes only a moment, but most people
spend several seconds planning the attack and, that whole
time, they’re wide open.
The Experience is the Goal
So, if winning is not the goal in sparring, what is the goal?
Why do we bother sparring at all? We spar to practice and
develop our skills while moving with a partner. We spar to
learn to avoid anxiety and frustration when we perform
poorly, and to avoid elation and ego gratification when we
perform well. Punching and kicking, throwing and grappling,
being punched, kicked and thrown — these are all just tools.
The aim is to perform within this experience to the best of
your ability while remaining calm and peaceful. This may
sound foreign to practitioners of modern-day, tournament-
style martial arts, but it is actually at the heart of authentic
practice.
Over a thousand years ago a man named Tamo Bodhidharma
became the abbot of a Buddhist temple in Hunan Province,
China. Legend records that, in taking over the temple, he
also shouldered the responsibility for the spiritual growth of
its monks. Noting that they were overweight, lethargic and
prone to falling asleep during their meditations, he decided
to institute an exercise program to integrate their spiritual
practice with a physical discipline. Thus was born martial arts.
To truly understand martial arts, we must understand the
origins of the practice. The ancient monks of Shaolin, like
monks everywhere, were seeking enlightenment, nirvana,
In sparring
you will rarely
get hit with
what you are
expecting.
If you feel
superior and
proud of winning,
did you?
As long as there
is duality there
will be conflict in
life. The martial
artist strives to
realize the oneness
in order to
overcome duality
thus extinguishing
conflict.
samadhi, satori, self-realization. Their belief was that this
state of consciousness could only be achieved by overcoming
the ego and unifying with the Divine. For centuries before
Tamo, rishis, yogis and monastics of all sects had employed
meditation to help clear the mind and raise consciousness.
The desired state was that of Oneness, and the ego was what
kept man in the delusion of duality. Good and evil, up and
down, male and female, winning and losing, the self and all
others. All of these perceptual divisions got in the way of
mental and spiritual clarity. To rise above this perception of
duality was the purpose of meditation.
But Bodhidharma’s monks were falling asleep! They could
meditate deeply, but would nonetheless find themselves
right back in body consciousness once they stopped
meditating. Tamo saw the need for a practice that would
be a bridge between meditation and day-to-day life, a
“moving meditation” that would unite the physical with
the mental and spiritual. He understood that the ego was at
its strongest in a man during a physical attack. The natural
responses of fight or flight are both ego-driven. To run away
from an attack out of fear that you will be hurt is to ignore
Oneness. To defend yourself with anger is to promote your
separateness. Either way, it fails to advance the monastic
path. So, Tamo decided that his monks would practice
fighting with each other. They would spar and develop
techniques of movement, and become so proficient that fear
and pride would both be beside-the-point. Winning and
losing would become meaningless.
This physical regimen served many purposes.
Capitalizing on weakness is a good strategy, but
strategy taken to the extreme becomes trickery.
1. it helped get the monks in shape;
2. the practice enabled them to protect the temple
if they were attacked; and
3. most importantly, they learned to practice physically
with the same calm peacefulness that they were able to
achieve in meditation.
In fact, the state of mind should be exactly the same whether
you are sitting in meditation, practicing martial techniques
(the moving meditation) or performing everyday activities.
You should remain one-pointedly focused and in the
moment. All reaction should come from a calm and peaceful
center. Compare this practice to what we currently think of as
“sparring” in the martial arts. There is no resemblance. The
point is that sparring was never designed as a competitive
game or a sport between opponents, but as a sacred practice,
as a partner drill to help clear the mind and raise the
consciousness.
A student once
asked his
teacher, “Sir,
when should I
most control my
mind?”
The teacher
responded,
“Now, now,
now, now . . .”
Use Practice for the Sake of Practice
This isn’t meant to be mystical. Tamo’s teaching was, and is,
utterly pragmatic. In practice, we feel the flow of energy
more clearly only when the ego is completely gone, when
practice exists for the sake of practice. In that moment, when
you’re sparring with a partner and not against an opponent,
there is only one energy. The energy you provide and the
energy I provide are gone. There is only the energy that we
are together. We’re playing the same song and harmonizing
perfectly. We are completely in the Now. At that moment,
there is no competition. No one’s winning and no one’s
losing. Once you stop worrying about offense and defense,
achievement or failure, the game is over, the sport is gone,
and all that’s left is art. That’s higher than any victory that
the ego can experience. Achieving victory is merely arriving
at a boundary you set for yourself. You reached the plateau,
but so what? There’s always another plateau, another
limit. Artistry is what transcends limitations, and allows the
moment to exist for its own sake.
We call this martial arts for a reason. This is an art that
transcends ego. This is a creative art that leads to the end
of separation. Tamo Bodhidharma’s gift – martial arts – is
a means of closing the gap between physical and mental,
between motion and non-motion, between good and
bad, victory and defeat, happiness and sadness, between
vengeance and love. Learn to spar well, for the right reasons
and with the proper motivation, and you learn to live in
harmony.
William had practiced martial arts from
What is the
difference between
an artist and a
technician? And
can you become
an artist just by
throwing more
technique?
the time he was eight years old. Now, at
twenty-seven, he was approaching his
twentieth year in martial arts. He was a
skinny young kid when he began, Now, as
a young man, he was completely filled out, strong and fast.
He remembered his excitement when he first entered the
school and how, later, his mother and his instructor had to
encourage him to stick it out when he had wanted to quit.
He remembered achieving his first, second and third degree
black belts. Now, as tournament season was coming to an
end, he was preparing for his fourth degree belt. William
was in the best shape of his life. He had collected 30 trophies
this year, more than in any year past. All of them were
in sparring. William loved to spar and, while perhaps not
consistently the best in the school, was certainly in the top
five.
One day, he came to the school a little earlier than usual,
just to stretch out and practice before classes. After he had
stretched, the master asked, “William, would you like to
spar? We haven’t in a while.”
William responded, “Yes, sir,” and quickly went to get
his practice gear. No one knew how long the master had
practiced, but it was known to be over forty years. As the two
men had bowed in, William began to size up the master. He
watched carefully at the way the master moved and looked
for the openings. William threw some fakes just to see how
his opponent would move. After a few moments, he decided
to launch an attack. William entered with a flurry of punches
and kicks. The master responded and the two men began.
After 30 or 40 minutes, the master said, “Time.”
The two men bowed and walked off the mat. William felt
a bit unsettled about what had just happened. They hadn’t
kept score, so he couldn’t be sure, but he guessed that he
had beaten the master. He said, “Sir, I am confused. I have
never done this well against you in sparring before.”
“Yes,” said the master, “your physical technique has come a
long way.”
William nodded and said, “If we were in a tournament I
would have won.”
The master responded, “Yes, today you would have, but
tomorrow maybe not. William, this is your problem. You still
spar for trophies — not for yourself. I’m not concerned at all
When you spar
you should see
yourself as well
as your partner.
In a self-defense
situation the
attitude must
be, “I will win. I
will continue to
fight until it is
over.”
In sparring, the
attitude should
be, “I will learn
as much as
possible.”
with winning and losing, but only in allowing the experience
to sweep over me. I know that, because of the experience, I
will be changed for the better. It might appear that we are
doing the same thing, sparring. You, however, are enhancing
your ego, while I am striving to let go of mine. Look at what
just happened. You feel superior and self-congratulatory
because you scored more points than I did. If you had scored
fewer points you would have been upset and disappointed.
Both reactions merely increase the delusion of separateness.
Neither reaction enhances the experience. Stop being so
concerned with victory or defeat and you will enjoy the
practice and the experience regardless of the outcome.
“You need to use sparring as it was intended, and not as
a sport or a game. Spar as if you and I were dancing. In a
dance, there are three energies at work: your own energy,
your partner’s energy, and the energy that you create
together.
In a dance, the object is not to get to a certain place on the
floor or to out-dance your partner. It is really to engross
yourself in the experience, so that when the dance is finished
you will remember such an enjoyable time that you want to
dance again.”
“So sparring is more than just fighting, with rules,” said
William.
The master smiled. “Just because you can win a fight does
not mean that you are a martial artist. You are a martial
artist when you use fighting to change your life.”
Activity
Practicing Mentally and Physically
The activity for this month is to choose one of your worst
techniques and consistently work on it in sparring. It can
be a combination, an advanced technique that you haven’t
done well, or a basic technique that you just don’t use much.
Use good control as you strive to develop speed and power.
Watch for good target areas and opportunities to throw
the combination or technique. This doesn’t mean that you
only use this technique, but give it a lot more attention than
anything else.
The result will, naturally, develop this technique, but
the real goal is to monitor your feelings, emotions and
attitude during the process. The benefits of this exercise
are enormous. It is common, at first, to become frustrated
and upset, and you will strongly want to return to using
a technique that you know will work for you. But as you
continue to develop the new skills, the feeling of frustration
will become one of excitement and anticipation. It may even
turn to confidence and a little cockiness. Be aware of all of
these changes in attitude and emotion.
Use the month to develop both your physical skills and to
monitor your internal environment. If you are not yet at the
level of sparring, substitute any partner drill and practice
the same exercise. Obviously, this is a good technique to
use at any time in your practice. Don’t use it this month and
forget it. At the end of the month, write a paragraph to
one page on which technique you chose and why. Describe
your internal experiences during the activity. Make a copy for
yourself and one to turn in to your instructor.
Learn to monitor
yourself in all
battles of life.
What do
you want
to achieve in
your lifetime?
Reminders
Designing your Life – Revisited
This month the reminder is simply that it is your life and
you are in control. By not deciding the direction of your life,
you allow yourself to be tossed about on the waves of other
people’s desires. The only way to cut through the waves is
to have both a sail and a rudder. The sail is energy, will and
indomitable spirit. The rudder is the direction and the tool
that helps to set the course.
It has been almost a year since you completed the activity
of designing your life. This was one of the most difficult
assignments in the course. So let’s go back and revisit it. Are
you actually following through with what you wrote one
year ago? Of course, if you did not do the activity in Module
One-Lesson Six, or didn’t finish it, do it now. If you completed
it then and put it on a shelf, dig it out!
You should have an established system for tracking your
progress in all of the areas you are committed to improving.
Chances are that you have made some improvements in some
areas, but remember, it takes effort in all of them to really
have a well-designed life. Critically analyze your progress
in your career, financial situation, spirituality, personal
relationships, health, community involvement, educational
opportunities, and your overall attitude. Are you happier,
healthier and more productive than you were a year ago? If
not, what areas of development have you neglected? Have
you sufficiently broken it down to a monthly process in each
category? Make an inventory list for the goals that you have
met on time, and the goals that you have not. Which goals
need to be revised or dropped completely? Have you inserted
any new goals that you have set for yourself?
Time is life, and your life is being designed right now. The
question is, are you or others designing it?
Keep your
commitments
to yourself.
Recommended Reading
Goals: Setting and Achieving
Them on Schedule,
Zig Ziglar
Living on Purpose
Dan Millman